I'd guess I've been very selfish all this while, taking almost everything for granted, my studies, and most importantly my Family. And now I'd very much regretted so, for not being a caring and thoughtful daughter; for not showing enough concern to my mum; some actions could have been executed immediately. I'm feeling kinda dishearten, after all that my mum has gone through, yet no signs of improvement or whichever positive encouragement to keep us motivated, especially depressing to my mum. Seeing my mum, undergoing all sorts of treatments and medications (minimum, mere painkillers) and coping with the torment psychologically, seriously, it's unbearable for me. Despite the agony she has to overcome, our only hope is that her sufferings would lessen and may she recover quickly. It's been almost a month now ever since her first complain on her aching and sore to both her legs, no improvements so far, she's even thinking of applying for no-pay-leave for maybe a month to recuperate from this anonymous illness.
Coincidentally, another colleague of my mum would be away due to health problem too, which means, my mum probably won't have her application approved (if she did apply for). Another issue that's bothering her, but we comfort her that whatever the case, the worst scenario would be my mum tendering her resignation (if her boss really sux, not taking her health into considerations), the crucial point is to get well again.
Anyway, mum was weeping moments ago, and I overheard it together with my bro; meanwhile dad's already in the room with her. I swear, I've never seen her feeling so dejected in my life, everyone was taken aback for that instant. I could feel my tears flooding in too, simply because I couldn't do much to help, apart from slight consoling and cleaning her tears off; I feel totally awful inside but I couldn't display my emotions, not to make her feel any worse off.
I have no idea how long it takes for my mum to recover, back to what she used to be. At this point, there are too many uncertainty still, too many doubts remain unsolved; nobody til date can answer to all the queries, nor helped my mum overcome this ordeal. If today's technology isn't sufficient to render us with help, I'd pray and sincerely seek for your help, God, please enlighten us, please let my mum get well, please regain her with strength and energy, please take away all the sufferings. I'm getting weak and desperate now. Give me strength.
Coincidentally, another colleague of my mum would be away due to health problem too, which means, my mum probably won't have her application approved (if she did apply for). Another issue that's bothering her, but we comfort her that whatever the case, the worst scenario would be my mum tendering her resignation (if her boss really sux, not taking her health into considerations), the crucial point is to get well again.
Anyway, mum was weeping moments ago, and I overheard it together with my bro; meanwhile dad's already in the room with her. I swear, I've never seen her feeling so dejected in my life, everyone was taken aback for that instant. I could feel my tears flooding in too, simply because I couldn't do much to help, apart from slight consoling and cleaning her tears off; I feel totally awful inside but I couldn't display my emotions, not to make her feel any worse off.
I have no idea how long it takes for my mum to recover, back to what she used to be. At this point, there are too many uncertainty still, too many doubts remain unsolved; nobody til date can answer to all the queries, nor helped my mum overcome this ordeal. If today's technology isn't sufficient to render us with help, I'd pray and sincerely seek for your help, God, please enlighten us, please let my mum get well, please regain her with strength and energy, please take away all the sufferings. I'm getting weak and desperate now. Give me strength.
I love you, mum <3
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